Today Women and Men march on Washington and around the world. It is beautiful, its poetic and its photogenic. It’ll be the only relevant piece of news for the entire day. News casters will follow it and brilliant passionate speeches will be heard and inspire women and men to do more for the race that is female. Hearts will swell with pride. Tears will be spilled and a feeling of comradery will sweep the nation and beyond.
Jen Psaki (a former white house staff member) said the march should be a “warm up”. Posting on Facebook, Instagram and tweeting is not enough. Women speakers urge you to get out there and participate in your communities, your schools, churches, work. Make a difference. Stand up for bullying, sexism, racism. Scream I am woman hear me roar!
Here’s the thing. This will be hard. Anyone that says it won’t be is fooling themselves. Oh I’m no Debbie downer, I want some girl power. I want to be unified. I want more job opportunities for women, I want equal pay, I want a better healthcare system, I want to feel the comradery. But in order to fix something we need to start talking about the elephant in the room- Women can be mean to Women.
Wait! Don’t throw your pink pussy hats at me! Although they’re cute, where do I get one? I’m just being honest. My two best friends are men. Most of my coworkers are men. If I’m calling myself a feminist, where are all the girls in my life? I have a couple ( just a couple Bevin? )…but that’s about it. Why?
Women can be mean to Women.
So why is that?
Well, a lot of what women are marching for today is telling. There aren’t enough job opportunities for us and we aren’t offered equal pay so there’s a sense of combativeness built up. We have a Hollywood stigma of what makes a woman beautiful that needs to be fixed also. It breeds bullying and worst of all – jealously. Jealously for not being allowed the same opportunities because we don’t look and act the way the media and films say we should. This creates competition via hunger game style – you want to live? Take down the others. Some of the harshest things ever said to me have come from women. “You’re fat.” “You’ve got love handles.” “No wonder you’re single.” “Why is it you aren’t married?” All of this rises up from a stigma that we, as female, need to be a certain way. Need to act a certain way. Live a certain way. Look a certain way.
We as women have a responsibility. We must get into the seat of power and change the game. We must start telling the stories. We must redefine what is beautiful. Redefine how what makes us female. And more importantly stop tearing down other females to get what we want. It’s a new mindset we have to adapt, preach and live.
Some of us want to be career women. Some of us want to be mothers. Some of us want to accomplish both. And that’s ok. Some of us want to dress in plaid and jeans. Some of us want to wear pencil skirts. Some of us would rather drink a beer than a cosmo. And that’s ok. Some of us never want to get married. Some of us want to be married. Some of us want an open relationship. And that’s ok. We want to work where we want to work, love who we want to love and live the way we want to live. And that’s ok.
Bullying comes from both sexes. And that’s NOT ok.
Remember today. Remember the feeling of unity. Remember the feeling of compassion. Remember the pride. Today women stand with women. Let’s make that everyday.
I love you my fellow Amazons!